The IoDad

The IoDad Believes In Belt Holsters

How will the Internet of Things achieve true market penetration? By allowing consumers the ability to make their lives better, easier and more convenient... or by amplifying their original selves to levels that they were previously unable to attain.

Which is why, honestly, it's going to be Dad-driven.

I'll cut to the chase, because there's venture capital to woo. (Or maybe a YouTube viral comedy video to make. That's a pretty common intersection, actually.)

If you gave me the ability to:

1) Have every light turn off when someone leaves the room

2) Sound an ear-splitting alarm when dishes are left in the sink, especially when there's room in the dish washer

3) Turn off air conditioners and space heaters when there are no humans in the room

4) Record and play digital video clips when people (well, OK, children) fail to put items away, especially laundry, because laundry

5) All while calculating the expense involved and/or saved as a running tally, either to be deducted from an allowance or college savings account, with that tally...

6) Pushed to any available screen, via a Dad-only smartphone app that's on an old school belt clip, because nothing says IoDad more than holstering stuff on your belt

7) With the ability to auto-play speeches about the electric, heating, air conditioning or environmental reason why such things are important, and

8) Back it all up with a countdown clock as to when various family members will head off to college / military...

Well, um, just take all of my money already and give me this thing.

Then, take all of my family's money to take it away...

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Feel free to comment, as well as like or share this column, connect with me on LinkedIn, or email me at davidlmountain at gmail dot com, or hit the RFP boxes at top right. RFPs are always free, and we hope to hear from you soon.

Five Points From A Road Trip Vacation

Not if the kids aren't looking

A few points to share with you all from my recent vacation, as it loosely pertains to the stated life goal of marketing and advertising. We promise that more coherent and full-form work will result as we get back in the swing of things, assuming, of course, that you found the previous work to be coherent, and in full form.

1) Shockingly, South of the Border still exists, and will punish you with relentless outdoor advertising... that children will totally miss.

The tourist trap that beckons I-95 commuters, with the questionable taste in Mexican-American humor and the omnipresent road signs? Still doing land office business, at least in terms of outdoor buys. Perhaps the costs of outdoor ads in the Carolinas makes it a slam dunk, but judging from the impact in my own car with my own kids -- locked into phones, iPods, and in the case of my budding eldest child, a ukelele -- it's not a winning investment in the future. Only the parent drivers noticed, and we're not exactly the target market to pull over for that destination.

2) The Internet of Things is such a slam dunk for theme parks.

This year, we revisited Universal Orlando, because the youngest is very much into the Potter... and truth be told, the whole family is pretty much down with those books and movies. You can now buy your budding witch or wizard a wand that is IoT connected, which means it will activate various actions in the themed areas, which is pretty cool, even in beta. Soon enough, of course, the tech will allow a much more definitive experience than just the same thing that other kids are doing, and the day when you can use it to skip a ride line or six, well then... maybe you won't wince so much at the cost for a stick of your kid's own. (Oh, and the memories, of course. Those essential memories.)

3) Seven days, one hour.

My little family are not culture snobs; we enjoy all kinds of mass market stuff, really. But in the week we were all sharing the same hotel room, the television was on for all of one hour -- the crossover episode of "Supergirl" with a guest appearance from the star of the CW's "The Flash" -- and then went right back off. Mostly this is because I wasn't watching sports, and knew that on demand would have everything I missed back home waiting for me, but still. If you are looking for evidence that the next generation isn't much into tech that isn't personal, here it was, in microcosm. And it's not exactly a new development.

4) Mapping tech makes all of this so much easier.

GPS saved us hours with alternatives to main highways in both directions, and also made getting around town, sometimes in torrential thunderstorms, much less stressful. I remember vacations without mapping apps, and I'm so glad that we never have to have one of those again.

5) Old school fun still works.

As good as the IoT and craft of Universal is -- and honestly, we had a fine time, though not, of course, a fine value -- there's something to be said for more traditional approaches. Two of the other three days for us were spent at Fun Spot, a park where you can enter and park for free and ride attractions that don't take very long at all, and Wet and Wild, the first waterpark in America. (It's closing at the end of the year for a Universal rebrand.) No screens, promotional tie-ins, must-have souvenirs or cachet to saying we went there... but the good times were as valid or better, and the overall day, probably superior. And so was the board game we played in the hotel room as a family, the time we spent in the car -- necessary to afford the other stuff -- and the overall bonding. It's good to get away, and it's better to be back. Onward!

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Feel free to comment, as well as like or share this column, connect with me on LinkedIn, or email me at davidlmountain at gmail dot com, or hit the RFP boxes at top right. RFPs are always free, and we hope to hear from you soon.

Negative Possibility and Self-Driving Cars

Probably Not Like This

As a father of an about to start driving teenager (and yes, I'm mostly mentioning this to freak out the colleagues who remember her from take your very small daughter to work days), I've been watching the advent of self-driving cars with strong interest. The eldest has a troublesome commute to her high school, so we've been eagerly awaiting her milestone day, and the subsequent test. While it will be a while before she turns that into solo trips, it's all in an easy to understand process, the same as driver less driving. But while I eagerly dream of a day when I can set and forget my commute and get in an extra half hour of sleep or work, and feel good about the blind and elderly adding to their quality of life, not to mention never paying for parking again...

Well, not so much with those about to drive. Skepticism towards the technology abounds, along with when it might actually be ready and operational, or having trust that it could ever be better than your own eyes and feet.

This makes no sense, right? The generation that can't ever put down their phones is unwilling to give up the wheel. Maybe it's just a matter of them not having enough experience with soul-deadening commutes, or that they are too tied up in the idea of how easily their tech freezes or fails. But honestly, we put our lives in the hands of technology on such a routine basis, from air traffic controllers to traffic lights, from medical records to food safety, from electrical grids to combustible fuels. But since we don't think about those things, and we do think about robot cars, well, fear.

Intellectually, we know this is a whiff. In our lifetimes, we're likely to regard driving cars in the same way that we look at doctors prescribing cigarettes, or never leaving the home without a hat. But in the short run, driving still represents freedom, independence, and lots of other things best sold in a car commercial.

There's also this: as a species, we are all-in for negative possibility, especially when the tech is new. Take a look at your Internet of Things feed, and I bet it's rife with security concerns. (Along with hackers shutting down your self-driving car.) If a loved one tells you about their new romantic interest, you stare them down hard for flaws. You'll never be more on your guard than the first time you try a new restaurant, or more focused then when you eat something you've never eaten before. Especially if it doesn't look a lot like something else you've eaten.

And with that, folks, I'm also hitting the road. It's time for some true time off, complete with significant road miles to coincide with the kids' spring break. Probably the last one where the eldest won't take the wheel for some part of the journey, too. Feel free to read up on the backlog of M&AD posts -- we're up to nearly 150 pieces in the archives! -- and drive safe. We'll be back in April.

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Feel free to comment, as well as like or share this column, connect with me on LinkedIn, or email me at davidlmountain at gmail dot com, or hit the RFP boxes at top right. RFPs are always free, and we hope to hear from you soon.